It seems like all anyone talks about these days is how little time they have. I don’t have time for this or that. I’m stressed out because I just don’t have time. Even on the weekends when we have time to spend with our friends and families we are often racing from one event to another. Sunday night arrives and we are exhausted and not in a happy fulfilled way. We are exhausted and emotionally spent in the there are 1,000 things I still need to do and I’m not sure where the weekend went kind of way. This is where wandering is my respite. When we wander, we embrace the moment and truly spend time together connecting.
The Treadmill
I’ve noticed that when we are racing from one “kid” activity to the next, we don’t really connect with our kids. It’s all about getting to event A then to event B and sometimes even event C. When we get home the kids run out the door to go see their friends. While I certainly want my kids to have time with their friends, I find that my partner and I then drift in different directions running errands, doing household chores, or (gasp) staring at a screen. However, when my family wanders, big or small, we connect, we engage, and we find the joy in living.
Wandering
Why is wandering so different than being home? For one thing we leave our distractions behind…well except for the camera. We have each other to talk to, to play with, and a whole world of mystery and beauty to explore. Our wanderings can be as simple as going to a local park and taking a short hike or as complex as getting out on a boat to adventure at sea. Really all we need is a rough plan and a place to get outside. For us one of our truly happy places is the beach.
We love to get up early (ok…we may not all love getting up early), drive to the beach and watch the sunrise. We pack a picnic lunch and take in a day of playing in the sand and sea. In the past year our wanderings dropped to a critically low point. We were working a lot, the kids had (a lot) of activities, and we never made it to the beach. Everyone was busy, but no one was having fun. We stepped back and realized it wasn’t the kids, it was us. We stopped prioritizing what is important; spending time together, we were trapped on a treadmill of life. So what have we done to have more time to wander?
Finding Time
We made time a priority. We talked about what we each love doing, not just liked but loved. We dropped some activities. We spend more time at home cooking, eating together and more time getting out in the world. We’ve gone camping, sailing, hiking and even just star gazed together. We decided what is important is us, not stuff, not the corporate ladder, but us. Our family. Wandering was important when it was two of us, three of us, and four of us. Somewhere we forgot that. Now we remember and everyone is happier. We even seem to have found more time.
I think the key to “having time” is to say yes to the truly important things. You don’t have to do it all. Figure out what is really important to you and focus on that. Find your happy place and get out and see the world.